Poop and Scoop (or Carry)

Scoop that poop.

A few unfortunate pronunciation mistakes I have made are with the word "cargar" which means to carry or haul, but for some reason with my American accent it sounds more like "cagar" (to sh!t) to Spanish speakers. I also have had trouble with "cancha" (field), because sometimes it sounds like "concha"--which literally means "conch shell," but is also a very vulgar term for a part of the female anatomy.

-Chris Glauser

Matters of Life and Death

Answer: Death Valley.

Learning to speak Portuguese can be especially frustrating when you sit next to a know-it-all native Spanish speaker. I couldn't help but smile when my classmate, intending to ask a native Brazilian where she lived ("de onde você mora?"), instead asked, "de onde você morre?" ("Where did you die?").

-Tracy Thorsen

Compliment the Chicken

Knit your own poulet.

I had a teacher tell me a funny story about a time in France--she was trying to compliment a friend's sweater ("pull") and with a mispronunciation complimented her chicken ("poulet"). "Hey, I love your chicken. Looks soft. Is it new?"

-Melody Pyper Anderson

Beano Might Help

More beano!

 In Italian the word "scoraggiare" (to discourage or to dishearten) differs by only one letter from the verb "to fart": "scoreggiare." One time during a church meeting I tried to encourage the members to not be discouraged during the week, however, amidst a few smiles from the elderly, and raucous laughter from the children, I quickly realized that I had encouraged the entire congregation to try not to fart during the week.

-Curtis Barton

I Am Beautiful!

Some things you just can't hide.

While learning Dutch, some friends and I were leaving our dorm to enjoy the beautiful weather in the quad. Suddenly, one of my friends who was somewhat shy but apparently had a sudden burst of confidence, stood up on a bench and exclaimed "Ik ben mooi!" (I am beautiful!) While the statement was true, she's the modest sort of girl who wouldn't normally shout that across the quad. We all got a good laugh as she quickly corrected: "Wait, I mean; Het is mooi! Het is mooi!" (It is beautiful!)

-Diana Brinton Crane

Nice Little Monster Souvenirs

Monsters and postcards living in harmony.

When I was in the States my friend took me to a mall where I could get some souvenirs. She was American but spoke Polish to me as she had lived in Poland some years before. We stopped by one of the shops where my friend tried really hard to convince me that I could get really nice little monsters there. Little monsters are "potworki" in Polish. After about an hour stopping by many other shops I realised she meant postcards, which is "pocztówki" in Polish. I will never forget that one.

-Karolina Szypkowska

No Wonder Moses Was So Mad

Probably the same look Moses had on his face.

While serving a Spanish-speaking mission, one day my companion and I were giving a gospel lesson about Moses. My companion stumbled over his words and we all just listened patiently as he slowly put the story together. 




He said, "La gente abajo estaban . . . haciendo . . . uh. . haciendo. . . " (All the people below were doing . . .uh . . . doing . . ." 


He just couldn't come up with a good word to explain how Moses' people were misbehaving. The man we were teaching finished his sentence for him with "Un orgia" (an orgy). Ew. 


My companion, not recognizing the word, thought that it sounded right and said, "YES! Exactly. An orgy." He continued to explain that the people were orgying and orgying and that we need to fight in our personal lives not to fall into the bad habit of orgying. I don't think a missionary has ever used the word "orgy" so many times while teaching about the Bible. Good advice really. We all learned something that day.

-Sam Schofield