Friday, March 30, 2012
While on a Spanish-speaking Mormon mission, my companion and I began making small talk with a twenty-something Hispanic man we didn't know. While we were talking, a woman came out of the house. The man said something to her, and my companion asked who she was. When the man said it was his girlfriend, my companion, intending a platitude equivalent to "Oh, cool!" said "Que buena!" which is more like, "Wow, she's hot!" The man then glowered and asked what that was supposed to mean. After a quick explanation, we ended the encounter quickly and left.
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
-Anonymous (you know who you are)
Monday, March 26, 2012
A missionary told his new companion to pronounce the "nacht" in "Nachtbar" (neighbor) with a strong K, which made it into "naked bar." The new companion asked everyone to refer any naked bars they knew of. Even though the members kept correcting him, the word had been reenforced enough that he just continued saying it that way.
Friday, March 23, 2012
There was a brand new missionary to Quebec and as is often the custom he was asked to introduce himself to the congregation at church. He said 'Bonjour, je m'appelle Elder Smith et je suis 'new'." In his nervousness he had forgotten the French word for new, which is "nouveau" and had unfortunately substituted it with the English word "new." The entire congregation erupted into a tremendous laugh at hearing the Elder say he was "naked."
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
|Are you choking or can I offer some other kind of support?|
It is reported that an experienced missionary in the French missions sometimes picked up a brand new junior companion at the train station, pretending to have such a raspy voice and sore throat that he needed the new man to request cough drops from the pharmacist. The new guy, not yet having a vocabulary that included medicinal terms, carefully practiced what he was told was the French word for cough drops: "soutien-gorge" (literally: "support-throat"). The newcomer would approach the counter and announce that he was in need of some very strong, very powerful soutiens-gorges, while the senior missionary would watch from a distance . . . where he could laugh at the red-faced younger missionary who had to endure the pharmacist's sign-language explanation that a soutien-gorge was a woman's brassiere.
Monday, March 19, 2012
|Get away as fast as you can!|
Friday, March 16, 2012
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
|A lecturing German caught in bronze.|
Luckily I liked Germany so much anyway that I moved there later.
Monday, March 12, 2012
|What kind of experience is Japanese food?|
Friday, March 9, 2012
|A true banana.|
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
|"Nurse" in German.|
"What did you say to him?" I asked.
"Piss in the bucket!" she said proudly.
Monday, March 5, 2012
|Dodge Ball Night.|
Friday, March 2, 2012
|Good night kiss/pillow.|